Hey There Fellas!
Let the day begin!
Welcome. We are so excited that we get the privilege of being a part of this exciting season of your life!
Groom Details
At the beginning of the day, one of our photographers will be coming to hangout with you and your attendants while you’re getting ready. I’ll explain more about what you can expect during that part of the day as you keep scrolling. The first thing they will need to capture are your details. You may be thinking “Um, I don’t have any details...” but you do! This may seem pointless but let me explain what these details are for. When we design album spreads, the goal of each spread is to tell a visual story of each part of the day. I will use these details shots to break up some of your getting ready shots on your “pre-ceremony” spread.
These are common details that we shoot on a regular basis but they are by no means mandatory in any way! This checklist could also include heirloom items like a pocket-watch or something that was handed down to you and while you may not actually wear it on the wedding day, you would like a shot of it.
Details To Gather
Cuff-Links
Tie or Bow Tie
Shoes
Any Military Detail
Gifted Liquor
Watch
Belt
Groomsmen Gifts
Cigar
Boutonnières
Vows
First of all, we realize that you have never done this before and that you may have preconceived ideas about how the photography part of your wedding experience is going to feel. That’s very normal. Having your photos taken isn’t always natural and can sometimes be more stressful than fun. The good news is, we’re committed to making your time with us not only natural and genuine but also enjoyable! Photography is a huge part of the wedding process and we want our couples to think back to their time with us and say, “That was so much easier than I thought it would be...in fact, it was actually fun!” Our second shooter will be hanging out with you and your guys while you’re getting ready. Now, the thought of a photographer hanging out in the room with you and your best friends on your wedding day probably sounds less than ideal, but here’s the good news....We are PROS at capturing this part of your day without making it weird! We’ll get to know your friends in an easy-going, natural way that will allow them to feel comfortable with us throughout the rest of the day. we'll take a few pictures of your guys hanging out and then he will prompt you (the groom) to do a few staged “Getting Ready” shots and a couple of classic portraits. We have found that staging a few “getting ready” shots is the most efficient way to get the shots we need while not interfering with too much of your hangout time! These staged shots will take about 10-15 minutes and we'll give you clear and concise instructions every step of the way.
What To Expect
When my second photographer arrives, they’ll want to capture the moments that tell your getting-ready story: putting on your tie, fastening your cufflinks, lacing up your shoes and sliding on your jacket. These are the images that bring your side of the day to life in your album! I know you may be excited and want to be fully dressed before we arrive, but it just doesn’t make sense to “fake it” once we get there. Re-tying a tie you’ve already tied never looks quite as natural as the real thing, so hold off on those final pieces until my second photographer is in the room with you. If you know you’ll need a lot of time to get ready, just let me know during our timeline meeting and I’ll make sure to allot time for you.
Getting Ready
the real thing
A LITTLE HELP GOES A LONG WAY
It’s also really nice to have your dad or best man helping you with your tie and jacket. These quiet moments with the people closest to you are ones you’ll be so glad to have years from now.
Before portrait time, I’ll ask you and all of your groomsmen to completely empty your pockets: phones, keys, wallets, sunglasses, lighters, all of it. Please remind your guys about this ahead of time, too! They will think they need their phone and keys, but I promise they will not.
Have a box or bag ready (or hand everything to a trusted family member) so it’s all in one safe place until portraits are done.
POCKET CHECK: Phones • Keys • Wallets • Sunglasses • Lighters
Empty Your
Pockets
There’s nothing worse than looking back at your wedding photos and seeing someone’s iPhone in their pocket. It’s one of those little things that’s easy to fix in the moment and impossible to un-see later!
Obviously, we want to take amazing photos of your day but we also know that the wedding day is not about photos, it’s about a lifelong commitment, being with family and friends and celebrating your new marriage! The party is a very important part! We realize that most fellas are not pumped about picture time and we get it. That’s why our goal, throughout the entire portrait process, is to have fun and get you to your party!! Rowdy groomsmen are a part of every wedding day and we actually find them to be hilarious and fun to work with! However, you can actually help us get you to your party faster by doing a few things!
PARTY
our goal:
get you to your
Encourage your guys to pay attention.
If you trust us, they will too.
Reassure them that the more they listen, the quicker they’ll be done.
Our goal is to take your photos quickly and efficiently so that you can spend as much time as possible with your friends and family! We love hanging out with your friends but we make it a top priority to make their experience with us fun, fast and enjoyable!!
SUITS + SHOES
Order or reserve your suits or tuxes about 3–4 months out and make sure every groomsman gets measured. Trying everything on before the wedding day is so important, especially if you’re renting. I’ve had grooms swimming in their jackets when a quick suit-up before the big day would have let them swap it out. Have you and all of your guys try everything on, shoes included, the week of the wedding. I’ve also had people searching for shoes on the wedding day, and that’s never fun!
HAIRCUT + GROOMING
Get your haircut about a week before the wedding, not the day before, so it has time to settle in. Trim or shape your beard a few days out, and skip trying any new skincare products the week of the wedding.
RINGS + VOWS
Choose one person, usually your best man, to be in charge of the rings. If you’re writing your own vows, finish them early, write them in a vow book (not your phone!) and practice reading them out loud.
Before The Big
Day
GROOMSMEN GIFTS
If your gifts are something your guys will wear on the day, hand them out at the rehearsal dinner. Otherwise, the morning of is perfect, and I’d love to capture it!
THE REHEARSAL
Usually the night before the wedding, the rehearsal is your practice run: where to stand, when to walk in and how you’ll walk out together. Traditionally the groom’s family hosts the rehearsal dinner, but do whatever works best for your families.
THE MORNING OF
Eat a real breakfast, drink plenty of water and go easy on the drinks before the ceremony. A note or small gift sent to your bride while you’re both getting ready means more than you think.
PACK A DAY-OF KIT
Lint Roller • Stain Stick • Deodorant • Collar Stays • Safety Pins • Breath Mints • Phone Charger • Tissues • Pain Reliever • Cash
AT THE CEREMONY
Stand with your hands relaxed in front of you and don’t lock your knees. When your bride walks down the aisle, watch her, not the guests. Hold your first kiss for a two-count so I can get the shot, then take your time walking back up the aisle together. A lot of couples do a dip or a kiss halfway down the aisle. It’s a fun shot, but it’s mostly a TikTok trend and not something you have to do!
On Your Wedding
Day
AT THE RECEPTION
Stay with your bride as much as you can. It’s easy to get pulled away by friends, but the best moments happen when you’re together. A short toast from the two of you, welcoming your guests and thanking them for being there, is a lovely touch. Before the night ends, know who’s driving you, who’s taking home the gifts and cards, and who’s returning the tux rentals.
Having a close friend or family member marry you is such a special touch! Here’s what you both need to know to make it official in Michigan.
GETTING ORDAINED
In Michigan, your officiant needs to be an ordained minister (or a judge, magistrate or mayor). Many friends get ordained online. Have them take care of this well before the wedding, and check with your county clerk if you have any questions.
YOUR MARRIAGE LICENSE
Apply at the county clerk’s office in the county where you live (if you live out of state, apply in the county where you’re getting married). There’s a 3-day waiting period, and the license is only good for 33 days, so don’t apply too early or too late. Bring it with you on the wedding day.
SIGNING THE LICENSE
You’ll need two witnesses who are over the age of 18. You, your witnesses and your officiant will each sign and print your names on every copy of the license. If either of you is changing your last name, sign with your new last name. The license also asks for the city, township or village and the county where your ceremony takes place, so know these ahead of time.
Having A Friend
Officiate?
AFTER THE WEDDING
Your officiant must return or mail the original license to the county clerk who issued it within 10 days, and you’ll keep a copy for your records. Requirements can vary a little by county, so double-check with your county clerk’s office.
So, after fifteen years of marriage, we have realized that there are many things that Ben is great at that I should never attempt to do, because when I do try to do them, it’s always a mess! One of these areas is travel planning. Ben is the expert here. He’s amazing at researching options, finding good deals, reading reviews, figuring out what works well with our credit card points and then actually booking everything without errors! It’s quite amazing and I’m thankful for this skill set of his. After photographing several weddings, I’ve noticed that there is a pattern with honeymoon planning. A lot of my KH Grooms are in charge of honeymoon planning while the bride is spending her time planning the wedding day. This may not be true for every KH Couple, so if your roles are reversed, you can swap guides for this part of the planning process! Here are five tips for planning your honeymoon that may be helpful as you are trying to make big decisions about where to go, what to spend and what will be a great fit for you as a couple.
TIP #1: KNOW YOUR BUDGET
Debt can be a huge stress on a new marriage. One thing you want to avoid is coming home from your honeymoon with a pile of credit card debt. That is sure to provide some newlywed tension! There are amazing, affordable options for honeymoons. Don’t feel like you have to keep up with the Instagram influencers and go to crazy locations. However, if your budget allows for a crazy location, then go for it! I have always wanted to stay in one of those over-the-water huts, but we’re still waiting for that to become a reality. Remember, your honeymoon is a big deal, but you have decades of anniversary trips ahead of you!
TIP #2: PLAN THIS TRIP FOR YOU + YOUR SPOUSE
This may sound super simple, but let me explain. Ben and I vacation very differently. My family grew up going to the beach and sitting on the sand all day and then going out to dinner every night. Ben’s family did RV’ing adventures and never sat still. They even made their own meals (doesn’t sound like a vacation to me!). So, for example, on our honeymoon we planned a trip to Florida because it was enough adventure for myself to wake up each morning in warm sun with the beach not too far away, and Orlando had plenty of places to go for adventure. It’s actually a good challenge to try to plan trips where we can both experience what we love. It could be that you’re both very similar in the way you love to travel, and that’s awesome! No matter what your dynamic is, I recommend checking in with one another about your honeymoon expectations as you plan. This can save you from a lot of unmet expectations and tensions that could arise on your trip.
TIP #3: ALL INCLUSIVE VS. NOT
I’m a big fan of all inclusive vacation options! It is so nice to not have to worry about the budget once your honeymoon begins. Something to consider about all-inclusive resorts is that you would more than likely be spending a lot of time at the resort, so you’ll want to do some thorough research about the pools, the beach amenities, reviews on the food, etc.
BONUS TIP: One thing that helps me decide about trips and where we want to go is to follow a resort’s Instagram account for a while just to get a feel for what they have to offer and what people choose to do there. This will give you more of a real-time peek into the resort instead of what you would find on their website or booking site.
Planning Your
Honeymoon
TIP #4: CREDIT CARD POINTS
This can be a touchy subject for some. I’m not telling you to max out credit cards by any means, but we have credit cards that we use daily and pay off monthly so that we rack up great credit card points. The year before you get married can be full of some decently large expenses. If you have a credit card with great points, be sure to use any large purchases to your advantage so that you can collect points to use on your honeymoon. (Just to be sure you don’t hear me saying “go into debt!”, only spend what you can afford and what is wise!) For those of you that may not fly often but want to be dedicated to one airline for the sake of points, it’s smart to choose an airline whose hub is closest to you. We have a Delta SkyMiles card that we book all of our flights through, which gives us great perks like free bags and priority boarding. Then we use points to upgrade our seats to Comfort Plus (think more leg room and more food and beverage options). I am a little obsessed with getting the most out of my credit card points! There is so much that you can get for free simply by doing your research. Some cards offer special bonus points during your first three months, so be sure to look into those options.
TIP #5: EXCURSIONS
If you are staying at a resort or on a cruise, there are normally options to do great excursions that will allow you to see more of the area, go shopping, do something active or visit a historical site. A lot of things you can do are zip lining, sunset cruises, snorkeling, hikes, four wheeler tours, helicopter tours, etc. These are an added cost and they can add up quick, so be sure to list them out by priority. Be sure to read reviews on excursions and look for honest feedback about whether or not it’s worth the investment!
THE TRUTH ABOUT CRUISES
You may be thinking “there is no way we are going on a cruise.” This past year we did. The truth is, not all cruises are like Carnival Cruise Lines. There are classy ways to cruise that will allow you to rest, enjoy good food, see multiple places without ever changing lodging locations, and do some adventurous excursions while also getting to have some beach days. Try to book cruises during the school year so there are fewer kids and families on board. Also, cruises are starting to create exclusive areas for a higher price. I have friends that have stayed in the Haven on Norwegian Cruise Line and it has spoiled them for any future cruises. So if it is in the budget to splurge on the upgrade, it is totally worth it!
DELAYED HONEYMOONS
I work with a lot of couples who go on delayed honeymoons and just get away for a couple of days right after the wedding, and this is a great option if you’re wanting to save up for a longer trip! Here are some of our favorite 2–3 day destinations right here in Michigan:
Cruises + Quick
Getaways
Petoskey • Manistee • Glen Arbor • Traverse City • Mackinac Island
Even if you’re getting married to the most relaxed partner on the planet, there will still be moments throughout this process where they will feel stressed. Planning a wedding isn’t for the faint of heart. There is a lot to be done, it’s expensive, and there can sometimes be unspoken expectations and lingering tension during the planning process. She may say it’s not stressful and that she’s fine, and even if that’s true, it will speak volumes to her if you do a few of the following:
Check on them: Ask her how planning is going and how they're feeling about it. When they share concerns, just let them be frustrated and don’t try to fix it!
Take on some tasks: You may already have a “honey-do” list for the wedding but if you haven’t already asked about helping them with some of their list, that would mean a lot to them!
Encourage Date Nights: It’s easy to spend all of your free time working on wedding stuff, but date nights are important too. Don’t neglect each other in the midst of the busyness of your engagement.
Be There For Your
Partner
You are her greatest source of encouragement! Through this entire engagement season, you two have a choice. This can either be stressful or it can actually be the most amazing season you have ever had in your relationship! Sure, there is a lot to do and a lot to plan, but these next few months will give you an opportunity to love each other in a new way, support each other in a new way, figure out new ways of solving problems, communicate more effectively and learn how to be on each other’s team. When you choose to view this season in that light, it changes everything. The season of engagement is supposed to be a time that prepares you for marriage and not a time that you can’t wait to get through! If there is anything we have learned over the last ten years of being married, it’s that every season of our life together presents us with an opportunity to either grow closer or distance ourselves from one another. We want you both to draw closer and feel more connected than ever when your wedding day arrives. My encouragement and challenge to you is to fight to make this season a healthy one!